Long Awaited Update (to 09July’08)

Sorry I haven’t updated this blog as promised on various blogs.  This has been a very compressed 12 18 days.  Stopping today, (03July 2008 ,) (09 July 2008 ) to “take a breath” as it were, I have had an opportunity to reflect on the outpouring of affection my father has been the recipient of.  His political email inbox is filled with well-wishes, and I am certain he knows it!  Unsurprisingly, there seems to be no difference in affection between those who are opposed, philosophically, to my Dad’s views and those who are in large agreement with him.  Reading his journal, I can agree with him that even the most “acrimonious contentions” cannot separate us, we who love this land.

Thinking about the last week 5 days, I realized that had I to post an update.  This update needed to fulfill several goals:

1. To bring everyone up to date, as promised Saturday 28June’08.
2. To take the time to thank everyone collectively for all the support that has poured out to our family.
3. To explain why I seem neglectful, (something Dad wouldn’t countenance) of those who have taken the time to express kind words and prayers on my father’s behalf.

So, let get started:

1.

Dad is still in a coma.  According to his (new) doctor, there is brain activity, and as far as they can tell, he should be awake.   Dad’s change of physician was triggered series of events that started Sat. (28June’08).  Suffice to say that his previous doctor wanted to remove the feeding and hydration, due to “quality of life issues” and the claim that hospital resources could be better utilized by someone younger.  At first, (i.e. afternoon Sat.28 June 2008 ) we thought it was because Dad’s insurance ran out that Sunday, (the 29th).  We were perplexed. To prevent a possible change in the level of care the preceding Thursday morning, when we paid the co-pay, the family had drafted a cashiers check from our emergency fund pre-paying the anticipated hospital bill for the next 2 weeks of hospitalization.  Not a co-pay, (because there was no insurance coverage after Sunday) the complete cost, based on the figures the hospital provided.  Point (2.) goes into the somewhat more detail, some of which is in the form of a stream-of-consciousness narrative.

Developments up to Thursday 03 July 2008

We met with the Head of Department today.  Dad’s current attending physician, who assisted during the surgery, gave us a heads-up, and told us that we might want to have Dad moved to another hospital.  Drawing us aside almost an hour prior to our scheduled appointment with the Department Head, he said that the “…politics of this department are not really conducive to your father’s recovery.  He’ll try to stampede you to fit his agenda.  I have just met with him, and his questions were quite leading.”

He told us that in his opinion, in his experience that from the location and size of hemorrhages in his brain, the amount of damage shown in the scans, and the fact that there is brain activity, that while the PTA and recovery might take sometime, but Dad’s a obviously a fighter.

The Meeting with the Head

Apparently Dad’s previous physician took offense at the request for a change of Attending.  The Head made that clear.  Also, according to this fellow, we are: hysterical, belligerent, unprofessional, meddlesome, irrational, interfering, troublesome, abusive to doctors and hospital staff, and uncooperative in the extreme, (yes I know that duplicates).  When we requested clarification so that we could correct our behavior, he refused to give particulars or specific incidents, or even who had committed the infractions, insisting that he needed to protect the privacy of his staff.

He then gave us his opinion on Dad’s chances, saying that even if he did wake up, the length of recovery speaks to “quality of life issues…”, and we should think of Dad’s dignity, and the difficulty he’ll have recovering.  He asked us if we why couldn’t see that this was best for him, that we should must just let him go.  He said that he thinks Dad is in PVS, (not what the Attending told us privately,) and then again insisted that it would best for everyone involved if we’d just stop harassing his doctors and see some sense.  Step-Mom asked him what caused him to think Dad was in PVS.  He told her that the scans showed that 35% of his brain was dark, (not true, we saw the EEG & the scans).  (An aside: This morning, [07 July 2008 ] we asked for a copy of Dad’s records, including the scans, but we’ve been informed all of Dad’s records have been misplaced.) He (the department head,) became quite angry, getting almost purple in the face and slapping the coffetable in his office with his fist, he yelled that “all you Army doctors want to use people as experiments!  Just give then their dignity!”

Then this Head of Department said he’d give us time to “…come to terms with the decision you have to make”.  He has warned us that Dad is taking up too much of the departments’ resources.  We reminded him that we paid fro Dad’s care, the entire amount the hospital asked, in the form of a cashiers check.  He told that wasn’t the point, there is no chance of Dad recovering, he’s too old anyway, and if necessary he will have the hospital get a court order (on the basis of what I guess boils down to an intractable coma/ Persistent Vegetative State) if necessary to allow the hospital to stop his feeding and hydration.  We have until Tuesday (15 July 2008 ) to “come to terms with the situation” and to sign the paperwork. He then told us that the conference was over, he had to go to another meeting.  The meeting took 35 minutes.

During the conference, I noticed on the coffee table between us a bunch of “The Humanist” magazines.  I looked them up online.  I wonder how much of his opinion is colored by that.

Status (05 July 2008 )

With the arrival of Benjamin’s wife, all who could be gathered together are here.  Benjamin’s serving in the ME, and out of contact, and George is under the sea, so we will have to make due.  There is still quite a crowd of us, though.

Dad’s still in a coma.  We’ve started to find a place for Dad, while we wait.

Status (12 July 2008 )

We’ve found a long term care facility, and move Dad today.  Maybe he’ll wake up soon.  I hope so.

Current Status (13 July 2008 )

The move took longer than expected.  One problem was the “loss” of Dad’s medical records.  All seemed lost, since the new place wouldn’t take Dad without his records.  They didn’t care that it was the other hospital’s fault they were misplaced.  When his current Doctor found out, he gave us an unofficial copy.   It was actually copy of his own records for Dad, plus some of the others he’d thought to make previous to Dad’s being “misplaced”.  I am uncertain that the original records were actually misplaced, but I have no proof.  It might just be paranoia from the long haul we’ve been under I know I’ve promised an update this morning, but I need to start getting ready for church NOW.   I’ll publish what I have here and complete the entry after the meetings.

2.

I really want to thank everyone who has sent cards, letters, email, commented on the blogs!  I know that that is aware of your support, and we, all of us,  really appreciate it.  I am sure that he will respond to each of you when he does awake, to personally thank you.  (I base that on his past actions.  I remember when Mom died, he answered each and every letter, card, and phone call with a personal letter.  It took a long while, but it taught us a lesson we cherish.)

I also want to extend my warmest thanks to those who have prayed on his behalf.  Even if you’ve never commented on any of the blogs I’ve placed notices, or on this blog, I want to make sure you know the family is grateful to you, too!  Thank you all, I am certain it has been efficacious!

Those many who’ve asked for our personal information in order to help more effectively, I must refuse.  Dad, for whatever reason, has chosen to tightly control his personal information. We have decided to honor that decision.  Dad can rethink it when he is up & about.

I can guess a few reasons for his caution. Step-Mom is a Major in the USAF.  Many people have the attitude of “what’s good for me is too good for thee”, and he didn’t want Step-Mom to catch heat via LOCs, LORs, etc.

I remember an incident during the Bush/Kerry election.  Step-Mom attended the semi-mandatory “make sure you act as an example of Citizenship & vote” meetings.  The person running the lecture was a middle-aged  black officer,  and her uniform was slovenly.  As Step-Mom put it, it hurt her to look at an officer in that level of disrepair.

Her entire presentation was peppered with “If you are new to the Air Force, if you’ll be here for a few years, you gotta vote for Kerry!  Bush doesn’t understand the military, he was AWOL, he…” well, you get the point.

This was presented to troop down to Airman.  Step-Mom quietly made a comment to the presenting officer afterward which boiled down to “you know, these presentations are to be non-partisan.  Its good to be enthusiastic but you could get into real trouble if the wrong person herd you urging people to vote for a particular person…”.  The woman thanked her, and Step-Mom thought that was that.

Not so.  She got an LOC for her trouble.  So I guess Dad didn’t want any chance that Step-Mom would pay for his stubbornness.

3.

Explanation

I will complete this after our Church meetings, probably by Monday 14 July 2008.

Thank you everyone for your patience.